He's Back!

I was wondering how Tom was going to adjust being back in NJ, and I got my answer today. After 7 hours of sleep I decided to try to get Tom up at 8:00 a.m. He told me to go away and mumbled something else under his breath. Later, at 8:30, I told him if he did not get up that I would have to go to the gym by myself, so he crawled out of bed and splashed water on his face in the bathroom, then he ate a good breakfast. We hung out until 9:30 and then went to the gym. We started working out at 9:45. At 9:55 he said, "Are you serious? When do we get a break?" I kept working out while he took breaks and lay down on the bench in the gym. (I have a pic on my phone) He then disappeared for a while, and when I went down stairs to look for him, he was pale with a green tint to his skin. His eyelids were red and his eyes - blood shot. I asked if he throw up and he responded that he did. He barely made it to the bathroom and had to throw up in the trash can while people looked on in horror. He then claimed he was feeling better and we finished our work out.
After just a few days, Tom has reverted back to his previous state. The natural man (or in Tom’s case “the creepy man”) has taken over. He does not like his slumber interrupted. He sleeps and throws up while doing physical activity and he eats too much junk food and then complains that we are trying to poison him.
It’s been great having Tom back as Tom. (I missed the good old days) I must admit, I have laughed more in the last 48 hours than the last two years. Tom is definitely the official creep. The creepiness is too creepy to put on the blog, but I wouldn't have it any other way. Living with Tom is much like living in Tooonville, where he is Mayor Creep.

I Have Been Vilified

After being away from my computer for one day I was astonished to see that Tom and Brittany’s “Right and Wrong Pronunciation Debate” has caused so many postings. First, if I knew my comments would be attacked in such a vicious manner, I would not have posted them. I also did not know the debate would transform into expressions beyond opinion of the subject matter and delve into personal injury.

I think maybe my comment was misunderstood by everyone. Let me try to make it clearer here:

I did some research on phonics relating to the continuing debate.

There are standard/nonstandard, formal/informal, and proper/improper ways to pronounce words in the English language. The standard, formal, or proper way to say a word depends on the dominant culture of where it is being said. If you pronounce a word while speaking, you may not be pronouncing it the nonstandard, informal, or improper way. For example, if you are talking to the Queen and pronounce something that goes against received pronunciation, and then you are pronouncing that word in the nonstandard, informal, or improper way.

For the right and wrong aspect of it I feel that many are misunderstanding the definitions of certain words.

Wrong: 1. not proper or usual; not in accordance with requirements or recommended practice: the wrong way to hold a golf club.

2. Unacceptable or undesirable according to social convention.

3. Not in accord with established usage, method, or procedure.

Right: 1. in conformity with fact, reason, truth, or some standard or principle

2. socially approved, desirable, or influential

3. properly or fittingly

Now that these definitions are understood, let me make my case even more clear, yet again. First, if you can say a word wrong then you must be able to say a word right. 1. So, if I was to pronounce a word in the English language that was not pronounced that way in any dialect, accent, or by any other human, then I would be pronouncing that word “wrong” because it was against and unacceptable with all social conventions. (Many ESL people and people with speech disorders struggle with this, which is why they have speech therapists) 2. There are four ways to say almond in America that are socially and culturally accepted, so if I pronounced almond another way then it would not be right, it would be improper or unusual and would not fit the recommended practice. 3. My last point is that if you follow the International Phonetic Alphabet the world uses and is socially accepted worldwide, you are speaking “right,” and if you do not, you are speaking “wrong.” If you take this point a step further and are talking about other languages, such as French or Spanish, there are absolute right and wrong ways to say words; so if you are using examples of some ethnic words being arbitrary in their pronunciation, you are sorely mistaken.

Penultimate Conclusion: Since we have normative ways to pronounce words in the English language in social and cultural aspects, there are “right” and “wrong” ways to say words. Since, I am now a master teacher, it has been my pleasure to educate all of you.
Conclusion: Often a teacher's job is not to tell students what to think but how to think by questioning opinions posed and to consider different perspectives on an issue by using various sources, not only one. This type of synthesis and evaluation influences children to develop higher order thinking and the ability to navigate a variety of texts in more than one way.

Family Law

I think we need to put together a council to judge complaints regarding family lore.
Possible Structure:
1. 3 person council (They have to be unbiased on the issue)
2. Each person puts forward their case using: expert witnesses, photo's, reasoning, and other evidence that will support their case.
3. They present their case before the family and everyone writes why they think a certain case should win.
4. Then the judges deliberate and come up with a verdict.
5. The judges decision is final, although there can be an appeal after a certain time then the case will go before 5 judges.

Family Fast

I think we should fast as a family more often. This month I think we should do a family fast for Phil, so he can find a job. What do you all think? I think we should fast for Tom next.

The Next Great American Super Hero

The Hairaiser

Don Prickles:
Bio: He is an agoraphobic living in Hovel Hideaway (A run-down motel that features individual hovels for long term guests). He has two friends who support him and bring him food and company. They try to get him out by setting up blind dates that always end in disaster. The only way he will go out is with his teddy bear for support. He is an online film critic, which gives him a substantial income. He will also go out if he dresses up in a costume and performs stand up. His alter-alter ego for stand up is the Cheeseball. He delivers cheesy one-liners that always bomb.

Recap: Agoraphobic, two friends, lives in hovel, can only go out if he has his teddy bear and on a date, does stand up in disguise as the Cheeseball, or fighting crime as The Hairaiser.

Alter-Ego: The Hairaiser:
Bio: His abilities were passed down since the beginning of time. There has always been a Hairaiser to defend the innocent as long as anyone could remember. But, can The Hairaiser still protect the people in the modern age? Where Don Prickles is weak and introverted, The Hairaiser is charming, extraverted, and confident.

Super Powers:
1. Cac Attack: Shoots hardened hair follicles out of his skin resembling cactus spurs. These spurs are slightly poisonous causing his enemies to become weak or pass out.
2. Hair Manipulation: Can use the hair on his body like an appendage. He can use hair collectively or individually depending on how much force is needed. Some examples are making a fist of hair to punch his enemies, creating trip lines, or using hair to swing around. The down side to this is he can only use the hair on his body, so if he loses too much hair he has to wait for it to grow back to have full strength.
3. Red Hot Hair Attack: When extremely angry his hair becomes red and hot causing severe burns on his enemies. Down side - his hair also becomes red and hot when he is blushing (Another reason dates don’t work out)
4. The Hair Ball: This is his most powerful power. He can throw balls of hair to consume his enemies or just a small hair ball to choke them. The price for this is that once the hair leaves his body it dies within minutes and is gone forever causing him to be in a weakened state until more hair grows.
5. Side Kicks: He hosts legions of fleas in his hair, but they only follow his commands if it is in their best interest or if he bribes them with treats. He is the only one that can hear them and they often are distracting especially on dates where they say inappropriate things.

Weaknesses:
1. Vixens: These women usually working with the enemy have certain attributes that The Hairaiser is blinded and distracted by. These women use their attributes to lure him into ambushes.
2. Hair Remover: Anything that removes hair - fire, Nair, scissors, razors, etc.

Enemies: Peter the Pie Man (More Coming Soon)

Friends: He is part of The International League of Super Hero’s. (More Coming Soon)